What Is A Backhanded Compliment? 10 Examples That Show Why It’s The Worst Thing Ever

A backhanded compliment, also known as a left-handed compliment, is a seemingly positive remark that, upon closer inspection, carries an underlying negative or insulting connotation. It’s a subtle blend of praise and criticism, often delivered with a smile that conceals a smirk. These comments are socially acceptable ways to veil negativity with a facade of positivity.

For instance, saying, “You’ve lost weight! You look much prettier now,” may initially sound like a compliment but implies that the person wasn’t attractive before the weight loss. Backhanded compliments are a mix of warm and cold, leaving the recipient feeling confused or insulted.

People give backhanded compliments for various reasons. Envy, unintentional snarkiness, attempting humor, and insecurity are common motivators. It’s a complex interplay of intention and impact, reflecting more about the giver than the receiver.

Examples of backhanded compliments include praising someone’s appearance while subtly referencing age, questioning the affordability of a possession, or suggesting that certain skills are unexpected from a particular gender or group.

Responding to a backhanded compliment requires finesse. Strategies include reflecting the comment back with a twist, quoting the comment later in a group setting, agreeing and amplifying in a humorous way, asking for clarification, questioning societal standards, using silence effectively, seeking genuine insight, maintaining class with a simple “thank you,” setting boundaries if needed, and empathizing with the giver.

In a world valuing authenticity, understanding what is a backhanded compliment, it’s crucial to aim for sincere compliments that uplift, rejecting the culture of subtle negativity inherent in backhanded compliments. Everyone deserves genuine appreciation without hidden criticisms.